Wednesday, November 7, 2012

Compliments

 
          I am a person that freely hands out compliments.  I guess I feel it is part of being nice and polite.  When I am on the receiving end, it simply blows me away.  There are times when I read the comments for the blogs I have written and am particularly moved when someone compliments me on my story or my writing.  I am usually so moved; I have tears in my eyes.

 

     Most of the time, I am apt not to believe people.  The bad stuff is easier to believe.  I have often wondered why compliments are so easy to hand out but so difficult to take in.  Maybe it is because deep down we simply don’t believe anything good about ourselves.   That is kind of depressing when you think about it, isn’t it?

 

      Yesterday morning I visited my doctor for a monthly check up.  He has had me on a diet to lose weight, strengthen my heart, and get healthy.  Usually the waiting room is chock full of people, but yesterday it was empty except for me.  I imagined that everyone was either at work or out voting.  To my surprise my doctor emerged with my file in hand, smiled a smile that lit up his face, and said “Kathy!  Hello! Come on back!”  I quickly replaced my bookmark in my book, grabbed my purse, and hurried to follow him after I picked my jaw up off the floor.  We passed his staff who were congregated in a close knit circle visiting amongst themselves as we went on to the exam room.  

      My blood pressure was good.  He listened to my heart…still ticking and sounding good.  Then it was time for me to step on the scale.  To my disappointment, I had gained a pound.  Crestfallen I went back to my seat.  Damn! I was sure I had lost weight! Instead I had gained a pound.  He patted my hand and reassured me that I was doing a fabulous job sticking to my diet.  I probably hadn’t gone to the bathroom before I came.  What??? My brain slammed in my head.  I swear to sunny Je$us I had went.  I had peed numerous times and went number 2 as well.  What the hell?  Should I have given myself an enema and endured a rousing bout of the $hits before I dared step on the scale?  Of course I kept all these brilliant revelations to myself.



 

         He watched me with a twinkle in his eye as I explained that I had watched my diet the very best I could.  But hells bells, Halloween had happened.  Hadn’t he noticed that?  My husband was home!!   He always is urging me to cheat on my diet.  Surely a little piece of candy can’t hurt.  Here have some breakfast sausages.  They are so good!!  Well yes, that is not the bloody point!  The point is that Three Musketeer candy bars and maple flavored sausages are no where on my diet sheet.  That is the bloody point!!  It was at that point that I realized that I had spoken all this aloud.  Embarrassed, I giggled a bit as I am prone to do.  


        “It is not like a snack size Three Musketeer candy bar and a couple sausage links will kill me, right?”  My doctor assured me that as long as I followed my diet most of the time, a slip here and there wouldn’t kill me.
        “It is only a pound.” he said with a smile. “You are doing fine!  I am so proud of you and how you are taking control of your life!” 
        “If only I could exercise maybe I could actually lose more!” I lamented.  It was then that the doctor gave me the proverbial golden key to the crapper.  I could exercise.  Yes indeed.  He encouraged me to march over to the local mall at least three times a week and walk at least a mile, and increase the distance from there.  The biggie was that I didn’t walk outside because the November cold air would do me in.  My mind rejoiced in the possibility of having an excuse to rush to the mall on a regular basis.  I have a pedometer.  I can do this!!  Who cares that I never have money to BUY anything?  It is free to look, and that is good enough for me!!  I HAVE to go for my health!! YAY!


 

        It was then that he shocked me again.  Out of the blue he told me “ You write very well.  You should write a book!”  The doctor had managed to shock me twice in the same day.  Where did that come from?  Even though yes, I do write, it never occurred to me that he of all people would have read any of it or that he knew that I write, let alone think that I was capable of writing a book anyone would ever want to read.   I am not a person that blows her own horn.  I  am blown away by compliments.  For some reason I have never felt I deserved them, but I am grateful and cherish each and every one like a precious gift.  What can I say?  If you give me a compliment, I like it until next time when I give you another glimpse into the life of a trucker’s wife.

34 comments:

  1. How did your doc know you were a writer? Does he lurk on your blog but not comment? Hey I'm like you....shocked whenever I receive a compliment. And, I can get like 10 compliments and 1 small criticism and guess what I obsess on? The criticism of course. I easily forget the accolades and just keep replaying the bad thing over and over. :(

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    1. JoJo, I may have told him a long time ago when I first started my blog that I was writing. It surely has been nothing we have discussed recently. I am the same way. One criticism will cancel out all the compliments in the world. It is so sad really. Thank you for stopping by to read and for your kind comments! ♥

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  2. It's weird, I can't take compliments well either. But after I think about it for a while, it does make me feel good & make me feel that whatever I was complimented on was worthwhile.

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    1. Nadia, I agree completely and know exactly what you mean. Thank you for stopping by to read and for your kind comments! ♥

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  3. So glad that you wrote about your progress Kathy. I was wondering but was afraid to ask. Guess I really shouldn't be afraid to ask because you've been sharing your problems and now I feel like we're friends, right?

    So proud of you and how you're taking control of your health. You've done great my friend. You're a winner and deserve compliments. Thanks for the post.

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    1. Betty, We are friends and have been for quite a while. Just wish this month would have shown a loss instead of a +1. Maybe next month I will show a loss. At least my blood pressure is good and my heart is sounding better. Thank you for stopping by to read and for your kind comments!♥

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    2. Yes, it is great Kathy that your blood pressure is good and your heart is better. That's quite an accomplishment you know. So -- just concentrate on what you've accomplished, do what the doctor says and you'll continue to be a winner.

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    3. Betty, I just wish I would lose more weight. Maybe dedicated walking will help. Thank you for the encouragement and for your kind comments! ♥

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  4. Compliments are weird things...I usually laugh nervously or look away from the person when they say them, if I read them (through blog comments or something) I end up blushing and feeling confused as to how to respond.

    I have to say - you do write incredibly well! I love checking in for my new insight into a truckers wife's life :)

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    1. Loki-Lou, it is hard to respond. Especially if your are eye to eye with the person. Thank you for your kind praise. I really appreciate you stopping by to read and for your kind comments. ♥

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  5. I think compliments are universally difficult. I still struggle with it, after losing 100+ pounds. It's like I don't trust them. I look forward to reading more of your blog. I like what I see. :-)

    Kelly
    http://beso519.blogspot.com/--my new non-weight-loss-related blog
    http://findingmywayatlast.blogspot.com/--my weight loss blog

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    1. Kelly, wow that is one hell of a great weight loss!! I can only dream about losing that much weight!! I am so pleased you stopped by and enjoyed what you found here. Thank you for your kind comments. ♥

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  6. Joining the club here - can easily give 'em, but taking a compliment is like taking a dagger in the heart. Wonder if there's a connection to body image/self-esteem somewhere in this connection? Great post, thanks for sharing!

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    1. Purple Dreamer, I bet there is. I have always struggled with low self esteem. After a while the bad stuff is easier to believe because that is all you have heard all your life. I find myself looking at people wondering just what kind of drugs they are on. LOL I am getting better with it though. Thank you for stopping in to read and comment. I am so pleased you enjoyed my post! ♥

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  7. Wow, you have a nice doctor. Mine barely gives me five minutes and then doesn't want to talk about anything that isn't related to the ONE thing I came in for. And I love Three Musketeers!

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    1. ElaineLK, it could help that he has been my doctor all my life (44 years). He brought me into the world, so we know each other pretty well. I know right? Three Musketeers are the bomb!! LOL Thank you for stopping by to read and for your kind comments! ♥

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  8. Thank you for commenting on my article link. I am so glad that you enjoyed the article. :)

    I read, with interest, this entry of yours. And I can relate. I never know how to react to a compliment - but I give them out all the time! Don't beat yourself up over your candy bar and sausages...as your doctor said - an occasional slip won't kill you.

    And you'll likely be happier with an occasional slip!
    :)

    My best,
    Cari

    http://carihahn.com/

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    1. Cari, as long as I don't stay on the proverbial slip and slide of chocolate bars and sausage everything should work out OK. LOL Thank you so much for stopping in to read and for your kind comments! ♥

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  9. Hey, this is a HARD time to diet. Starts with Halloween, and spills right into the winter holidays, ending at Easter, if you celebrate it -- but no better time to start either! I wonder how many people put on an extra 5 every winter? Hurray for you for keeping at it, good luck with your mall hikes, and keep writing! You have a simple and straightforward style that is fun to read.

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    1. Julia, you can say that again!! I love Thanksgiving but, this year will be hard to stick on the straight and narrow. My doctor gave me a free pass for Thanksgiving as long as I watch my portions. I will still feel guilty eating what I shouldn't. I always cook a big spread, and this year will be no different. My husband will be home and expects it. :D He said the long haul is what matters, not the one day. As far as the mall hikes, the kids and I went once already this week. A mile went quick. Last night I had a meeting at my son's school about the science fair, and tonight my daughter has a 4H community service project we are participating in. So maybe Friday. I am so pleased you enjoy reading what I write. :D Now if I could wipe the shit eating grin off my face!! LOL All these comments make my day. Thank you for stopping by to read and for your kind comments! ♥

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  10. I have a doc like yours, very personal and always interested in what I'm doing and how Momma is and the kids; I love him, too.

    Happy to hear you're doing well and I agree the walking will be good!

    Compliments come in two kinds, I think, one being the sincere and one being the "what I should say" kind. I don't like the second. I don't like comments that say...good post. period. Means nothing to me. You know?

    I like the ones with a message or sharing their own view and if they include a compliment, I will probably feel good about that one. I can take a compliment, if it feels real.

    I can also take a good blog when I find one, I try not to miss any...oh, like yours! ♥

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    1. Jo, I am not sure what I will do if anything ever happens to my doctor and I have to find a new one. It will rock my world. He is one in a million. So far so good!! I will file away the anatomy of a good comment for future reference. Thank you for stopping by to read and for your sweet comments! ♥

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  11. I struggle at times to receive compliments. I just don't like being put on the spot...but it is a very humbling experience when it happens.

    Congrats on doing so well with your diet and weight. I do find it creepy your doc knew about your writing. Is he lurking in the shadows of your blog **WAVES AT THE DOC** I think it is great he found a way for you to exercise!!

    Cheers, Jenn

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    1. Jenn, I really have my doubts about him lurking. LOL I have told him in the past what I have been doing and he probably just remembered. He has amazed me all my life with the little tidbits he remembers. When I was growing up he always asked me about my 4H projects. If it was anyone else, yes, it might be creepy. I take it as a compliment that he remembered and acknowledged it. Thank you for stopping by to read and for your kind comments! ♥

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  12. I love compliments but also have a hard time believing them most of the time. Not that I don't believe in people. I just don't believe in myself as much. But compliments are always good, whether we're giving them or receiving. They're good for the heart and it spreads love around. After all, we all need to feel good about what's right in our world.

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    1. Anne, you hit the nail right on the head. That is ME all over. I don't believe in myself. Compliments sure have a way of brightening up a day. Thank you for stopping by to read and for your kind comments! ♥

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  13. Yay you Kathy! :) I'm so happy your journey of health is progressing so wonderfully and absolutely take all those compliments. I suppose I'm just the opposite. If I walk into a room with a new blouse or dress on and no one says anything, I'm like, "Hello, new outfit, I look fabulous, where are my worshippers??" ;) Compliments are fabulous, to give and to receive! Like this one, "You're awesome Kathy!" - Receive it my bloggee pal! :D

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    1. Mimi, LMAO! Why am I not surprised you would do just that? I love it!! Thank you for stopping by to read and for your kind comments. ♥

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  14. This is a subject near and dear to my heart, Sadly most of us are taught to criticize what we do, when we should have been learning to critique it. It is a small bit of semantics, but big impact. I agree with your doctor, you should write a book, your writing is excellent.

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    1. Rennata, you are so very kind!! I think it is so much better to spread a little sunshine around and make someone laugh than tear someone down. My mom always taught me that if I didn't have anything nice to say to keep my mouth shut and treat others as I would want them to treat me. I have never forgot either piece of advice. It really isn't that hard to find something nice to say and for most people, it makes all the difference in the world to how their day goes. That one little glimmer of happiness, good will and light, can make all the difference. Just as your kind comments brought a smile to my face and tears to my eyes, it is a gift that has lightened my day. I thank you so very much for stopping by to read and for your kind comments!! ♥

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  15. Giving a sincere compliment is really so very important, Kathy, you say it well. It makes everyone feel so much better and really makes another person's day! Thanks for pointing it out!!

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    1. Michelle, Absolutely!! Thank you for stopping by to read and for your kind comments! I don't know of anyone who couldn't use a little more kindness and reason to smile each day. :D ♥

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    2. I love those - the ones that come unexpectedly. It makes all the difference in a day. Cherish the moment because it will keep on giving.

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    3. Brenda, I agree completely with you! Thank you for stopping by to read and for your kind comments!! ♥

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