The biggest confrontation of my life is still a very vivid memory. It was a moment when I finally stood up for myself. It was the proverbial straw that broke the camels back of my first marriage. At the time, we lived with my parents. We never did officially set up housekeeping like normal married couples. At first, it was because we didn’t have a lot of money. After the beatings started, I was afraid to live alone with him. I truly think he would have killed me. I didn’t have to do anything to set him off at all. At the time I was working a full time job and going to college at night. He worked 2nd shift, so by the time he got home, I was usually asleep. I had to get up early the next morning and go to work. The fact that I was asleep was enough to pi$$ him off. I remember being grabbed by the hair and thrown out of bed and slammed against the wall in a heap being a normal every night ritual.
Shortly after my mom was first put on dialysis, my brother in law and his girlfriend had come to visit. My ex had already put away a case of beer and was lit. He was to the point where he could turn on me at any minute. He became mean when he drank, and I have to admit…I was terrified of him. I didn’t have to do much to set him off. I have terrible allergies, and a runny nose could get me slapped upside the head and thrown into a wall quicker than I could bat an eyelash. At that point in life I was afraid to leave him and knew it was a moot point because we lived with my parents. Where in G0d’s holy name could I go? Who would have helped me? I had nowhere to go, and no one who would help me. People tend to avoid things like this and don't want to get involved. I didn’t want to burden others, and primarily I was ashamed. At that point in my life, I believed I deserved to be treated that way. After all, I was the dumb a$$ that said “I do” when I should have said “I don’t think so!” I took my wedding vows seriously and firmly believed “till death do us part”.
I walked out in the living room and heard the three of them planning on tying fireworks to my cat and blowing her straight to hell. I had no doubt in my mind that they would do it. I was terrified and took my cat to my mother and told her to lock her bedroom door. At that point my mother was outraged. She grabbed her faithful shotgun Maude and marched out to the living room and ordered them all to get out of her house immediately or she would go get the sheriff who lived down the street.
My ex-husband picked me up and threw me into the piano and then advanced towards my mother. I picked myself up and put myself between him and her. For the first time, I stood up to him and offered myself up to be sacrificed. I told him he could kill me, but there was no way in hell I would allow him to lay one finger on my mom. That stopped him cold. He finally got the hint and left with his company following close behind. I had made up my mind that it was over. He was never going to lay a hand on me again. He would either stop and leave, or kill me in the process. Either way, I wasn’t being treated that way anymore by anyone.
Something inside me snapped that night with that momentous confrontation. He left and filed for a divorce. It was finally over, and I had survived. I came out of that situation a much stronger person with a backbone made of steel. The shy, timid mouse was gone and in her place a strong lady armed with a ready supply of whip-a$$ ready to take on the world. I will never tolerate that kind of treatment again. Thank G0d I lived to tell the tale, married my dear trucker husband, had children, and finally got to find true happiness until next time when I give you another glimpse into the life of a trucker’s wife.
