Quick! Spend One Million Dollars!

      Today in the land of NaBloPoMo they want to know what I would do if I found a million dollars alongside the road and had only till nightfall to spend it.  I can’t even imagine having that kind of money to spend as usually I am the one walking around the grocery store subtracting the prices off a piece of paper of every single item that goes into my shopping cart.  Yeah, I am that lady.  I balance and figure down to the last penny getting as much for my dollar because I have too.  To have that much money would be overwhelming but I can assure you I would waste little time getting busy spending it.

      First and foremost, I would pay off my house in full.  Any outstanding bills would be paid off in full.  My husband would be getting his teeth fixed and back into tip top condition with no excuses and no waiting till tax time. I would then hire some handy men to redo my kitchen.  Goodbye leaky refrigerator that leaves a river from some mysterious source.  It cools the food, so I wipe it up and go on with life usually.  With a million bucks burning a hole in my pocket I would be heading out and buying brand new appliances, not just any appliances, but cherry red appliances.  There would be new kitchen cabinets with tons of nooks and crannies and counter space to put stuff.  I have nowhere to put anything now.  I would make sure to get new wall to wall carpeting and all the walls could do with new vibrant paint that artistically shouts “Hello!  Kathy lives here!!!”    I would enlarge my son’s bedroom.  It is the smallest room in the house and the boy needs more space!    Course, since I am redecorating everything else, might as well go whole hog and make sure the bathroom and bedrooms get a makeover too.  I probably should and would have the septic tank pumped.  I mean hey, the shitter could be full.  Best to get that cleaned out while I have the money to do it, right?

        I would add on to the garage.  I would buy a brand new John Deere tractor for my husband with all the bells and whistles.  You know leaf sucker uppers, plow, enclosures, whatever comes with tractors. Of course we would each require a brand new vehicle...an SUV for me and a bad ass truck for my husband.   I would get a bigger swimming pool on the way complete with patio furniture to surround it for lazy summer days. 

     Each kid would have their own computer and printer.  Each kid would have their own smart phone.  Each kid would be assured of one hell of a Christmas.  For that matter, I would make sure my husband and I had a good Christmas by loading a big chunk on 4 individual gift cards for each person to spend as they wish.  If they needed clothes I would be buying them.  New shoes, new snow boots, you name it.  I would shop till I dropped.

     I would book trips to faraway places.  Can you say vacation?  I would make sure I had accommodations and airfare to everywhere I ever wanted to go and see.  London, Paris, Disney World, you name it and I would have it booked and be going there and seeing it.  I would be buying the best seats in the house to see my favorite bands and season tickets to see Notre Dame football up close and personal.

      Of course, last but not least while I had my hot little hands on such a big pile of doh- rey- me I would have to pay for a final resting place for myself, my husband, and kids.  I would put money in trust for my kids futures.  I would stock a freezer with plenty of meat and the refrigerator with plenty of food.  I would pay off any outstanding bills I had and set up trusts or accounts to draw from at a later date if any health issues arose whether it be a pimple on the ass to the big horrifying cancer or other mysterious diseases that come along and make a person writhe in pain and misery.  That way when the sun sets, I would be exhausted but I would could live the rest of my life with no worries letting each day unfold and play out.  Hakuna Matata!