7 Lessons

I am taking part in “The Write Tribe Festival of Words 1st to 7th September 2013". 

1. Some things and people in life are not worth the time, effort, or the emotional investment needed to associate with them.   It is with a heavy heart when I finally give up on people, but if their prime objective in life is to cut me down and make me miserable I simply don’t need the negativity or the drama.  They can use their evil talents on someone else.

2. Live one day at a time.  I simply can’t worry myself about tomorrow.  I have no control over it.  For all I know I could be dead tomorrow.   My future will unfold as God intends and I will be grateful for each and every blessing He passes my way. 

3. Let God do the worrying for me.  For the longest time I would worry myself sick about everything.  Then one day I realized while reading my bible that God really wants us to unload our burdens on Him.  He wants to be a part of our lives and be connected with us.  I am constantly amazed how quickly he answers my prayers and sees to my every need…especially when I ask.  Most of the time my prayers are filled with thanking him for my blessings and asking for blessings for others. Very rarely do I ask for anything for myself.  When I do I am amazed how quickly He responds.

  
4. Laugh.  I have found that laughter makes a person feel better, makes life roll along so much easier, and the quality of life is greatly improved.  So I laugh out loud often even when there is nothing to laugh about, I still find something crazy to laugh about.  I have fun.  I crank my tunes and enjoy life. 

5. Over the years I have longed for friends.  I wanted more than anything to belong.  One day something really amazing happened.  I had an epiphany and realized I like me and I like my solitude, a lot!  I enjoy my own company.  There is nothing better than to be home alone with my tunes cranked, surrounded by my dogs, writing, reading, and just being me.  I don’t really need anyone else to do that.  I am often at my happiest when I am home alone, reading, writing, creating, and in tune with my own thoughts.  




6. You can only do your best.  Not everyone will like what you do, but the folks that do will out shine the ones that don’t.  If you do your best, you can walk away with your held high and feel accomplished.

7. No one is perfect!  Cut yourself some slack.  If you did your best, then you have nothing to be ashamed of.  Laugh it off, learn from mistakes, and try again tomorrow.  Celebrate those victories, no matter how small.  

Being Brave

NaBloPoMo asks : 

What is the bravest thing you have ever done?

       When it gets right down to brass tacks  I am only brave when I have no other choice and only after I have freaked out, practically $hit myself worrying about it, and am forced to handle myself by someone else or by circumstance.  I am scared of roller coasters and other scary rides and refuse to ride them although I have before.  I don’t like scary movies and refuse to brave watching them although I have done that too.  I would never strap on a parachute and jump out of an airplane for the thrill of it.  I am scared of heights and doubt I would ever put myself into a situation testing whether I could overcome it unless I needed to save someone I loved.  I endured abuse for years at the hands of my ex husband but one day overcame my fear to bravely offer myself up in sacrifice so he wouldn’t hurt my mom.

     I bravely have faced what I have had to whether it is surgeries, death, or loneliness.   I have faced the terror of being raped and survived because I didn’t have a choice.  I have bravely stayed alone when everyone else worried I shouldn’t simply because it was better to get used to the inevitable than putting it off.   I have overcome the fear of being alone and found solace within myself when everyone else insisted I needed others to be happy.  I bravely face each day of life with optimism counting my blessings.

    
      I think a person does what they have to do in life.  You don’t think about it.  You just do it.  From somewhere deep within you draw the strength needed.  You summon courage from that same deep place.   You do what is right and appropriate.  It is as simple as that.  Whether it constitutes true bravery or not, I have no idea.    I am like the brave little kitten in the video taking on the huge dog.  I refuse to be intimidated…therefore I can be brave if need be until next time when I give you another glimpse into the life of a trucker’s wife.

Impulse

   

  Am I impulsive?  That is the question.  I used to be.  After one to many disasters I guess I got over most of my impulsiveness.  Most of my impulsiveness stemmed from having my head firmly up my a$$ and giving little thought to what I was doing before I did it.

   

       For example, a couple times I decided to visit a guy I was seeing at the time unannounced.  Both instances turned out to be a nightmare from hell.  One was in the process of screwing someone else which was awkward, and the other greeted me with a glare and asked me what the hell I was doing there.  One time while living in Nashville, Tennessee I decided I was home sick and after telling my mom I wasn’t going to come home that weekend I threw my books and bags in the back of my Dodge Shelby Charger and hauled a$$ for home anyway.  I never checked the weather or announced I was coming home; I just took off after my last class without a care in the world with my radio blaring.  In the process of trying to get home I was chased by a tornado and drove my car into a moat.  Even in high school I had a one track mind.  One time I purposely stayed after school to stalk the boy I liked who happened to be at football practice only to lock my keys in my car.  Another nice guy helped me get my car unlocked and I went home completely mortified.  

       Men seemed to have the effect of making me do completely idiotic stuff.  Thank G0d and sunny Je$us that I found one that would have me.  He is still around to this day.  As of yesterday we have been married 15 years.  Before he came along I learned the hard way with all people that it never ever paid to be nice.  When I was in high school I had a huge crush on this one guy who barely knew I existed.  I followed him about with my tongue hanging out like a pathetic puppy.  I was in pep club and quickly volunteered to be this guy’s secret locker pal.  What that meant was that I would decorate his locker for every single game.  A couple of times I went all out and baked him brownies.  In hindsight, I could have just kicked myself.  He really was never that nice to me and didn’t deserve the extra attention.  You live and learn.

         After I left high school I met a guy who I seen a few times.  We lived far apart and our relationship or what there was never amounted to much because of the distance.  One day I called his house and discovered he had been in a car accident.  I drove an hour and a half to see him in the hospital.  When I arrived, another girl was there to take him home.  To say he was surprised to see me would be an understatement.  Once again I retreated feeling like a complete a$$.

        Years later I was overwhelmed with a sickening desire to be nice.  My mother in law had been in the hospital so I took my children to see her each and every day despite the fact she has never liked me.  Everything seemed fine on the surface but as soon as my husband returned to town all hell broke loose and she made up lies about things I supposedly said or she imagined I said.  None of it was true and I learned it was for the best that I quit being nice and steer clear of her.  Why give people ideas for ammunition to use against you?

        You can say after all of this I have learned a few valuable lessons.  In all things really think before you act.  As much as I want to be impulsive and reckless, it sure doesn’t pay until next time when I give you another glimpse into the life of a trucker’s wife.

Life Lessons-BFF 197

      Over the course of my life I have learned several survival tactics to keep me sane and my heart in tact.  They are life lessons I didn’t always get the first time around but eventually understood and then put into practice.

1) Just because you are related to someone through blood or marriage doesn’t guarantee that they care whether you live or die.  When you are born you are placed within a family for better or for worse.  However, it is your life.  You can choose to have these people get their jollies making you miserable or you can choose to avoid them like the plague and leave them to stew in their own $hit and make someone else miserable.  Life is entirely too short to be miserable because you can’t cut the strings.  They will always be your family.  Nothing will change that, but you choose how much access you allow them of your life and how much time you give them if any.

2) No matter what you do, you will always have bills.  Even if you pay them on time, they will still show up again next month.  For a long time I made myself sick over the bills I didn’t have the money to pay.  No matter how much bill collectors try to bully you, those same bills will still be there tomorrow if you don’t have the money today…and guess what?  The world won’t come to an end if you don’t give them your payment immediately over the phone today.  No matter what they say, the sun will come up tomorrow whether they get your payment today or not.  Guess what, you will get them paid and it will come out alright in the end.

3)  People who lie to you and put you down are not your friends, and never were.

4)  The old saying that being nice to others will insure they are nice to you back is not always true.  What is true is if you are nice to others, you will have no regrets or anything they can truly hold against you later.

5) Stand up for yourself.  If you don’t, you can’t count on the fact anyone else will.  Grow some balls and fight for yourself.  Know when to walk away and know when to run. Know when to stand your ground and kick some a$$!

6) Enjoy life, and don’t sweat the small stuff.  Give all your worries to the L0rd.  Only He can really do anything about things anyway.

7) If you believe, the L0rd always provides.

8) Don’t expect much, and appreciate everything.  Life will go a lot smoother and you in turn will be a lot happier.







9)  Everyone has gifts and their own special abilities.  Love people for whom they are and never expect them to be someone they are not.

10)  Whatever you put off, like doing the dishes, will still be there for you to do later.  Eventually you will have to do it, so bite the bullet and get it over with.

11) Live each day as if it is your last with no regrets.  

12) If you do it, own it and take responsibility for your words and actions.  If you are not willing to do that, you might be better off keeping your mouth shut.




     Just a few life lessons I have learned along the way until next time when I give you another glimpse into the life of a trucker’s wife.

Lessons from the Playground

    What are the most important lessons I learned from the playground??  The last playground I recall playing on myself was in elementary school.  I have lots of memories from recess, but what did I learn?

      The first time I got on a teeter-totter the other kid jumped off when I wasn’t ready.  The teeter totter banged to the ground and the jarring slammed my chin into the metal handle I was holding in a death grip.  My chin quickly covered with blood and my eyes filled with tears.  That was the first and last time I ever got on a teeter-totter.  Lesson number 1: steer clear of the teeter totter!

      I loved to swing on the swings but got a little queasy the higher the swing soared.  My friends and I used to put our legs through the swing beside the one we were on and allow ourselves to be pushed.  Instead of feeling a thrill over soaring through the sky, I felt a wave of terror and screamed like a little girl.  Lesson number 2: If the swing goes to high, drop your feet, and slow yourself down.  To hell with those kids that tease you because you are a scaredy cat!   Later in life when I took my kids to the park I witnessed this idiot kid who was swinging way too high.  At the highest point, he jumped.  He ended up black, blue, and bloody.  Lesson number 3: Use your head. If the swings aren’t surrounded by something soft and instead have 2X4’s around the perimeter, don’t jump. Hello!!!! You could hit the wood and end up road kill. Take two for safety!  Better yet, don’t jump at all!

        Lesson number 4: The best games in the world are those that come from your own imagination.  Much like my kids pretending they are at Hogwarts and Harry Potter cohorts, my friends and I used to pretend we were the characters from our favorite TV shows.   Back in my day my friends and I would play “Little House on the Prairie” where yours truly was Laura, and “Pinky Tuscadero and the Pinkettes” where I was a Pinkette.  Pinky Tuscadero was featured on the TV show “Happy Days” and we took great delight in singing to the trees that bordered the playground.  Lesson number 5: trees make a great audience. They are incapable of throwing tomatoes or booing. Lesson number 6:  You can be anyone you want to be in your imagination, if only until the whistle blows!

        Another lesson that comes to mind is to wait your turn.  Only one kid can generally go down the slide at once, and if used properly and safely only one kid can get on a swing.  Finally, last but not least…avoid standing to close to the monkey bars because you might get kicked in the head. Seriously, my son learned this lesson the hard way.  Unfortunately, it seems most lessons in life, especially on the playground, are learned that way until next time when I give you another glimpse into the life of a trucker’s wife.

Curiosity

     They say curiosity killed the cat. I don’t know if curiosity ever killed anyone, but it can sure get you in a world of trouble. Unless you happen to be a curious little monkey like Curious George, I have found that a person eventually grows out of the need to be overly curious. People who don’t grow out of this curious stage become scientists.

     Of my own children my oldest was always the more curious of the two. She certainly was the most sneaky and between the ages of 1 or 2 tended to get herself into a world of $hit every time my back was turned. I can think of three separate occurrences that come to mind. Most things usually happened while I was either on the phone or in the bathroom. Even a trip to the laundry room to transfer the wash from the washer to the dryer could reap disastrous results! She would sneak away and the next thing I knew…all hell had broke loose.

     One time I left her happily playing with her toys and watching Sesame Street. Sometimes you simply have got to pee! She was quiet, and I never suspected any foul play. I came back to the living room to discover her gone. My heart began to beat a little faster as the panic set in. I called her name and began to search. She was a baby who could only crawl. How far could she get? As I rounded the corner and entered the kitchen I discovered my daughter had managed to get the Fry Daddy out of the bottom cupboard and dump the oil all over her and the floor and was happily waving her hands in the greasy goop. What a mess!! It hadn’t mattered that we had installed the Safety First locks on the cupboard doors, she had figured out not only how to get them open but managed to haul out the Fry Daddy and dump the contents.

     Another time the telephone rang. I don’t remember who was on the phone. It really doesn’t matter, the resulting disaster would have happened regardless. One minute my precious girl was happily entertained with her toys and the next she was gone. By the time I took up the search, I found her in the bathroom in the process of stuffing every single roll of toilet paper into the toilet. It wasn’t just one of those 4 packs either. I had bought an economy size package with multiple rolls. She had taken out every single roll and shoved them into the toilet. As for the roll that was beside the toilet, she had unwound it down until all that remained was the cardboard tube and it pooled around her on the floor. As I gasped in horror and shouted her name, she smiled and said “Mama”!

     There was also the day that my little scientist decided to shove a bar of soap into the VCR where unknown to anyone it melted and effectively screwed up the works. Every time I tried to put in a movie, the VCR would groan and spit it right back out. I peered inside and was horrified to discover a melted mass that smelled amazingly like Dial soap. Of course, my little darling was all innocence. It didn’t take much to figure out who had put the soap into the VCR.

     Curiosity does have its upsides. With every mistake, learning comes. She learned what goes in the Fry Daddy should stay in the Fry Daddy, toilets were not meant to accommodate that much toilet paper, and VCRs are for videocassettes not soap. The memories that are created from such incidents are delegated to family legend making up the fabric of our lives. Even without an owners manual on parenting  your kid, somehow you both survive.  That is all I have to say until the next time when I give you another glimpse into the life of a trucker’s wife.