Say What?

“So,  if six chickens laid nine eggs a week, how many did the duck lay?”  

What kind of question is that?

 I hate story problems! 

Is this a trick question where I am solving for x?  

Eggs?

Chickens?

 Ducks? 

I’m screwed!

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Numbers

     Back when I was in school, I hated math.  I hated numbers.  They made my brain tired and I would be the first one to admit it.  At that time, you only needed one math class to graduate.  It was before the country became all gung ho on science and math and desperate to catch up with the rest of the world and be able to compete.  The concept of math and numbers never came easy to me. 

      To be fair, I never failed math in the history of time.  I struggled.  It wasn’t an easy A for me.  I got B’s and C’s in math.  It was hard to comprehend.  Hide a math problem inside a small cryptic paragraph and I was completely lost. That became even more the case by the time freshmen Algebra was on the agenda.  I was in a state of confusion from the get go.   

        Once again not only did equations and expressions hit me head on with unknown variables but once again some smart a$$ decided it was necessary to include story problems in the mix.  G0d help me!  On top of that I had a complete witch for a math teacher that year which didn’t help matters one bit.  She was far more interested in spending time in the hall than teaching Algebra.  G0d help you if you didn’t get it the first time around and didn’t happen to be a cheerleader or some popular jock.  If you were like me and fell into the category of being invisible and not one of the beautiful people plus were clueless to where to begin to solve anything, you were on your own and screwed.  She had no time to deal with the likes of me.  I was so confused by the whole thing I didn’t even know what questions to ask. 

        My mom being the math wizard she was tried to help me.  She had the knack of always getting the right answers.  The only problem was she didn’t use the same procedure to get the answer as the teacher so in my teacher’s mind it was wrong even though the answer was correct.  It was maddening!!  Finally parent teacher conferences rolled around and my mom was fed up.  She dragged me to parent teacher conferences and gave that woman a good telling off in front of G0d and everyone.  You could have heard a pin drop in that cafeteria as every other teacher and parent turned to stare.

 

      I would like to say my mom’s tirade did the trick, but it didn’t.  I avoided math like the plague for the rest of high school.  To my utter shock and dismay when tested for placement in an appropriate college math course at Belmont, I was placed in College Algebra.  I had not had the background in high school math that was prerequisite so I am not sure how I managed that.  It was in college that I finally came across professors dedicated to breaking through that black hole between my ears.  I left college with A’s in classes I was required to take.  

 

       Since I’ve become an adult I have discovered I use math all the time.  Numbers are everywhere!!  Whether I am figuring out how many hours it will take my husband to get from A to B or figuring out how to stretch the all mighty dollar to pay bills, buy groceries, put a little go-go juice in the Blazer, and get everything we need until the next payday, I use numbers constantly.  To my utter shock, both of my kids have proved themselves to be gifted in math.  I wonder how that happened!! So far I am happy to say I have had enough brains to figure out any questions they have had, although I know that won’t always be the case.  Maybe in the future they will unlock the complete mystery of numbers that has always eluded me.  To my everyday surprise, numbers continue to be apart of my every day life and even more shocking I seem to know what to do with them!  I have no idea how that happened but I am relieved it finally did until next time when I give you another glimpse into the life of a trucker’s wife.

         

Manic Monday-BFF 175

        While most normal folks find Mondays off the charts and manic, I can just as easily encounter manic days anytime. Even though I am a stay at home mommy, my life isn’t all  ice cream, and fanciful unicorns pooping butterflies and rainbows.  It would be really nice if it was, but it isn’t. While most folks thank G0d for Fridays, I am the oddball that dreads it.  I may not trade places with someone like in "Freaky Friday", but they usually are just as crazy.


         

          Friday is payday at our house. What that means for me is that the realities of the bills that make a steady stream to my door finally need to be dealt with. I can ignore them any other day, but not Friday. Friday morning I have no excuse because there is always money in the account. I have always hated math, and on Fridays I have to use math to figure down to the last cent where every bit of that money will go. Once I finally have a game plan it is time to grab my keys, head for the door and the open road with the soul ambition of paying bills. It is the day that for about 5 minutes there is money in the account. Once the bills are paid and the groceries are bought, I am sent back to the land of “without” at warp speed, broke until the next Friday. I can admit with a smile that I am used to this existence to the point that if I actually have extra money, I hardly know how to react. 

        I remember the days moons ago when I worked a full time job. Although a distant memory, I still remember dreading returning to work Monday after the weekend. Once at work, the week would roll along smoothly enough. Before I knew what hit me it was hump day, then Friday rolled around again with the promise of the weekend stretching out before me. During the school year Monday means getting up early once again and ensuring both kids are dressed, pressed, and on their school buses. 

        Now that both of my kids are at school, the rest of the day stretches out before me in a lazy hazy kind of way. After the bus pulls away I return to a relatively quiet house punctuated by the earth shattering snores of my Boston terrier. This is especially welcome on days like today when I have rolled out of bed with a killer migraine, a slightly queasy stomach, and a good old fashioned attack of TMJ. It is so nice on days like this when I don’t have to face the outside world. I can just hibernate and be miserable alone, blogging when the spirit moves me. 


      

         That wasn’t completely in the cards today though. I realized 3 seconds after my son’s bus pulled away that I had forgotten to put his red folder in his back pack. I rushed it to school, only to be shocked to find a set of parents screaming in the office. Evidently the mother wanted to take their child out of school. The woman took one look at me and rushed from the room declaring that she needed to pray. What in the world?? She rushed back in and continued her tirade. I honestly didn’t know what to think and was mesmerized at the scene playing out before me. I am sure that my jaw dropped and my eyes bugged out of my head as I stared at her in fascination. Whether rude to stare or not, the spectacle she was creating was too good to miss.  

     So you see, any slight diversion in the same ole same ole from my routine can result in a manic day, and it doesn’t have to fall on Monday until next time when I give you another glimpse into the life of a trucker’s wife.

Upset

         I get upset when the $hit hit’s the fan just like anyone else. I also tend to hyperventilate, break a blood vessel, and completely lose it before I calm down, let go, and let G0d.  Even stuff that shouldn’t upset me and should make me proud as a peacock throws me for a loop.   Last night I got a letter from my son’s school which informed me that he has been slated for high ability classes for next year.    I had an inkling of this because he has already been moved into high ability math classes.  He is doing math that seems unimaginable for a mere kindergartner to do.  It boggles my mind!

        What really got my panties in a bunch last night was the school included a form for “me” to fill out to give them a little more insight into what makes my son tick.  That is the moment I lost it.  My son has been a mystery to me since he was born.  Of my two children, he is the one that I am completely clueless about.  I have always wished I would have been provided with a user’s manual with him because he does things most of the time that defies imagination on all realms of the spectrum. 

        I went into my bedroom and sat on the bed with this questionnaire and cried as I looked through all the things they wanted to know. It was in multiple choice and essay question format.  I hyperventilated and tears came to my eyes.  How would I know???  I didn’t know I would have to take a test!  The teachers were around him all day, they nominated him, don’t they know??  I begged my daughter to help me choose the answers that best described her brother.  I felt like the worse mother in the world because I didn’t know the answers instantly and really had to think about it.

         Once I started really thinking about it the answers came.  I admit to having my head firmly planted up my a$$ most of the time but I still would have liked to have known that I knew my own son.  For example, I was convinced my son struggled to read.  He has never given me any indication that he could.  Yesterday my husband and I had lunch with my son at school and I asked his teacher about his reading problems.  She informed me that he didn’t have a problem that she knew of.  He likes mommy to read to him, not the other way around.  Last night I sat down and showed him flashcards that had lists of rhyming words.  To my amazement, not only did he know every single word, he didn’t even have to think about it!!  


   

      On the same page my daughter was upset because she had to miss gym class to be tested for high ability.  It was funny.  She was hoping she didn’t do to well on the test because she didn’t want to leave her friends.  I guess my kids are just to smart for their own good.  In that vein, my daughter is to much like me.  When I went to college the school made me take placement exams to know which classes to place me in.  I have always hated math.  It makes my brain tired.  It isn’t that I can’t do it, it is just I would rather not.  Evidently I scored a little to high and was mad to discover that I had managed to avoid calculus but got placed in algebra which was the next highest class.  Considering I only ever took freshmen algebra in high school, I was not amused.  Guess the apple doesn’t fall to far from the tree after all.

         By the morning after the storm had passed.  The form is filled out and has been sent back to the school.  I realized my son must be a lot smarter than he lets on.  I am so proud of my kids.  I would have been proud of them regardless.  When I really thought about it, it wasn't that hard to figure him out after all!  Life goes on once again until next time when I give you another glimpse into the life of a trucker’s wife.