A is for Accomplishment

     A is also for Arlee, the founder of the A-Z Challenge.  Because of our good friend Arlee, bloggers all over the world are coming together during the month of April with one common goal in mind…to blog from A-Z.  When the month of April is over, those that have taken up the challenge, grabbed the brass ring, and survived will feel an overwhelming sense of accomplishment!  It is a worthy quest!  



    My word for today is for accomplishment.  I have to admit that since having my children and choosing to be a stay at home mom my list of accomplishments in most people’s minds is nil.  While some may give me credit for getting out of bed each morning as an accomplishment, others would scoff.  

     This last weekend I have felt a wave of pride and accomplishment on completing my second Web Design course.  I not only completed, but aced my final.  At the end of the day, holding that certificate of completion in my hot little hands gives me a sense of accomplishment that I haven’t known in a very long time.  It is priceless.   Since I have two of those fancy dancy certificates on my wall, it tells me and the world if they care that I have completed 48 hours of course work in web design successfully.  It doesn’t matter that I did it from the comfort of my home online.  What matters is that I did it.




      For years I thought going back to school for anything was no longer an option for me.  Here I am doing it.  Yes, I can be taught and it feels good!  Life is full of accomplishments.  If you think about it and celebrate each and every small feat, life can be a little more worth living.

Sex Education

NaBloPoMo asks

“Do you think sex education should come from the parents, the school, or a mix of both?

     I think sex education should come from a mixture of both.   Back when I was growing up, I admit I was completely clueless about sex.  It was not a subject my mom ever discussed and it would have been a cold day in hell when I would have asked questions about such a thing.  In the 6th grade I got a rude awakening when the powers that be at the school decided it was time to separate the girls from the boys and show gender specific movies about the reproductive system.  Up until that moment, I never even knew I had a vagina.  I had assumed that a woman felt a whopper of a shit coming on and then a baby emerged after much grunting.  Surprise, surprise, and don’t forget to wipe!  Hell, I didn’t know!  I assumed men had something to do with the process, but I had absolutely no clue how the whole thing was accomplished.

     I remember the movie appalling me.  The idea of bleeding every month down there was not only gross but humiliating.  I wasn’t the only one whose jaw dropped and eyes bugged out that day.   The ride home on the bus proved that at least one of the boys in my class was as astonished by the information he received that day from his movie.  He found out he had peanuts in his pants!  If I were him, I would have been ruined from eating nuts for the rest of my life.

      I was never subjected to the talk about the birds and the bees at home.    Back in those days, if you wanted to see an “R” rated movie that included sex, you had to go to the theater and be 18.  Yes, I grew up in the time period before the invention of VCR’s, DVD’s, cable, and the internet and they sure as hell didn’t show stuff like that on TV.  My education was next to none on the subject.  My folks obviously did the deed or I wouldn’t be here, but growing up you would have never guessed exactly what the deed was.  It was a subject that was never discussed.  I was completely clueless.

 

       Embarrassing as it is to admit, by the time I got my first real look-see at what lurked inside a man’s boxer shorts at almost 19 I had no idea what the hell to do with it or where to put it.  It was awkward as hell.  I felt like a complete moron and I was.  When I had my own children I made a vow early on that neither one of my kids were ever going to be as ignorant as their mother was.  We discuss it.   It is perfectly natural and nothing to be ashamed of. It is part of life.  In this day in age, ignorance is not bliss.  I would rather have my kids be informed and benefit from my experience and wisdom.  I don’t come up with screwy names for what lies between their legs; I give them the actual terms.  I answer any questions they have as honestly and truthfully as I can.  I owe them that much.

 

         The education they receive on the subject at school only adds to their knowledge.  Knowledge is a wonderful thing.  Better to have it, than to be left floundering and wondering why.  Ignorance can lead to an unwanted pregnancy or worse yet a STD that they could carry with them the rest of their lives.  Seems to me it would be more useful to be educated in sex than in mythology or algebra.  At least, that knowledge you will use and build on all your life.

 

Beginnings

    If you think about it, life is full of beginnings.  With a single cry, life begins fresh and new.  We know little more than the sound of our mother’s voice and the warmth of the womb, still we forge ahead tasting, seeing, and experiencing life each moment taking each day as it comes.

    School begins.  We begin to learn amazing things: how to read, how to write, how to calculate, and how to philosophize and along the way we learn how to make friends.  Friendships begin, and then they end.  Some friendships last forever if we’re lucky.  If not, people drift through our life at an alarming rate fulfilling their purpose in our life touching us in profound ways.  Touching us as fate would have it. 

 

    Boy meets girl and love is discovered, and sometimes hate, sadness, rejection, and disappointment.  Romances begin, and sometimes end.  They always begin again until our soul mate waltzes into our lives and knock us for a loop.  From each new beginning we learn.  Marriage marks a new beginning filled with promise and hope.  Couples forge through life together marking new beginnings as home owners and as parents.

        The arrival of a baby marks a special beginning.  Each beginning is a departure from how life used to be and although scary, each beginning is filled with excitement and anticipation.  Sometimes all goes wrong.  We survive divorce and forge again with someone new discovering that even after heartache and loss a new beginning is always possible.

     We work, we play, we live and each day marks a new beginning filled with promise and hope.  Each new day is fresh with no mistakes.  A new day is like a fresh new page of our life to be written on.  Beginnings bring excitement and fear of the unknown, but somehow we adjust and embrace the beginnings and life continues to flow and we grow.  Even death will be a new beginning where we will finally discover what really lies beyond that last breath.  Even though I will probably always agonize about new beginnings a little, I have found as I grow older it is becoming a little easier to embrace what will and must come until next time when I give you another glimpse into the life of a trucker’s wife.

L is for Live and Learn

     We begin life as innocent babies completely dependent on those around us for food, shelter, and love.  Hopefully we are fulfilled and can truly count on those who should love us most.  Sadly there are some who must find their way alone without the benefit of loving guidance.  Time passes and we grow, we live, and we learn.  Life isn’t always easy, but we learn from our mistakes as well as from our triumphs.

      We learn from example how to eat, mingle, play, and to dress ourselves.  From the very beginning of our lives we learn by observation everything we need to know to get through life.    We begin our formal education in kindergarten learning the magic of the ABC’s, how to count, and even more importantly how to get along with others.  Over the years we acquire more skills from reading to computation.   As time goes on each person’s individual talents and blessings come gradually to light.  Those who can sing, sing.  Those who are artistic, create.  Those who are analytical, figure things out for the rest of us and make it all make perfect sense.  Some people graduate high school and then darken the halls of higher learning.  Still others settle down, get a job, and choose to raise a family.  Still others manage to do both.

        Eventually we find our soul mate, and use everything we have learned before to embark on a life together.  Children come along, and we struggle to make ends meet.  We worry and fret, but eventually we find our way.  We travel the path of our lives learning life’s lessons as we go, doing what is our fate to do, teach what we need to teach to those who depend on us most, and then we die.  Each life is peppered with laughter, sadness, good times, and bad, and hopefully filled with happiness, fulfillment, and love.


         Each life is unique and different, and we travel down the road of the life we live and learn at our own pace until next time when I give you another glimpse into the life of a trucker’s wife.

Upset

         I get upset when the $hit hit’s the fan just like anyone else. I also tend to hyperventilate, break a blood vessel, and completely lose it before I calm down, let go, and let G0d.  Even stuff that shouldn’t upset me and should make me proud as a peacock throws me for a loop.   Last night I got a letter from my son’s school which informed me that he has been slated for high ability classes for next year.    I had an inkling of this because he has already been moved into high ability math classes.  He is doing math that seems unimaginable for a mere kindergartner to do.  It boggles my mind!

        What really got my panties in a bunch last night was the school included a form for “me” to fill out to give them a little more insight into what makes my son tick.  That is the moment I lost it.  My son has been a mystery to me since he was born.  Of my two children, he is the one that I am completely clueless about.  I have always wished I would have been provided with a user’s manual with him because he does things most of the time that defies imagination on all realms of the spectrum. 

        I went into my bedroom and sat on the bed with this questionnaire and cried as I looked through all the things they wanted to know. It was in multiple choice and essay question format.  I hyperventilated and tears came to my eyes.  How would I know???  I didn’t know I would have to take a test!  The teachers were around him all day, they nominated him, don’t they know??  I begged my daughter to help me choose the answers that best described her brother.  I felt like the worse mother in the world because I didn’t know the answers instantly and really had to think about it.

         Once I started really thinking about it the answers came.  I admit to having my head firmly planted up my a$$ most of the time but I still would have liked to have known that I knew my own son.  For example, I was convinced my son struggled to read.  He has never given me any indication that he could.  Yesterday my husband and I had lunch with my son at school and I asked his teacher about his reading problems.  She informed me that he didn’t have a problem that she knew of.  He likes mommy to read to him, not the other way around.  Last night I sat down and showed him flashcards that had lists of rhyming words.  To my amazement, not only did he know every single word, he didn’t even have to think about it!!  


   

      On the same page my daughter was upset because she had to miss gym class to be tested for high ability.  It was funny.  She was hoping she didn’t do to well on the test because she didn’t want to leave her friends.  I guess my kids are just to smart for their own good.  In that vein, my daughter is to much like me.  When I went to college the school made me take placement exams to know which classes to place me in.  I have always hated math.  It makes my brain tired.  It isn’t that I can’t do it, it is just I would rather not.  Evidently I scored a little to high and was mad to discover that I had managed to avoid calculus but got placed in algebra which was the next highest class.  Considering I only ever took freshmen algebra in high school, I was not amused.  Guess the apple doesn’t fall to far from the tree after all.

         By the morning after the storm had passed.  The form is filled out and has been sent back to the school.  I realized my son must be a lot smarter than he lets on.  I am so proud of my kids.  I would have been proud of them regardless.  When I really thought about it, it wasn't that hard to figure him out after all!  Life goes on once again until next time when I give you another glimpse into the life of a trucker’s wife.

Letter to Myself at 16, Love Me- BFF 157

      With the knowledge of what the future holds for you, I have several choice pieces of advice that I hope you will take to heart and follow.

     High school is just a microscopic moment in your life. Try not to let your lack of friends mar your outlook of the big picture. You are on the right track thinking that family is important. Enjoy your family while they are around, appreciate them, and live each day as if it were your last telling each person how much they mean to you. Life is short and you will find that out soon enough.

      As far as the opposite sex goes, it doesn’t really matter in the grand scheme of things. Know that the boys that you are currently in school with are not the ones you will spend the rest of your life with. They are merely ships passing in the night. Don’t pine after someone who has no interest in you. Don’t waste your time! Focus on what makes you happy and value friendships. Don’t be so quick to say yes to the first a$$ that notices your existence!! Trust me that it isn’t worth the heartache that awaits you. Value yourself for you and realize you don’t need a guy to make you happy. Find joy within. Also, it really doesn’t matter how big your b00bs are in life, so quit wishing they were bigger!! You will discover after you have kids that bigger isn’t always better.

      When you get it into your head to spread your wings and go to college follow your instincts and study something you are passionate about right out of the starting gate instead of settling on a passing fancy that quickly fizzles. Don’t be so quick to throw in the towel. If you get your education out of the way and stick with it, you have more chance of actually following through and getting that degree. If you keep putting it off, you never will get it. Life will take over and the opportunity will pass you by. Grab the bull by the balls and go after it! Quit being so afraid of the unknown. Keep your eyes on the prize!

       The biggest piece of advice I have to offer is to give others a chance. Don’t throw in the towel to quickly. Don't ever give up!  You may live to regret it! Remember that the answers you seek are no further than the deepest desires and recesses of your heart. If you follow your inner voice you will never take the wrong course. Have faith and bide your time. As far as people that are lost causes go, sometimes you simply have to cut your losses and walk away. Finally, don’t worry, and be happy. Give your worries to the L0rd, count your blessings, and take it one day at a time and you will be OK. Above all, strive to be happy regardless of your lot in life. Find the good in all situations and life will be one grand adventure instead of a nightmare from hell.

Love, Me