Tuesday, May 13, 2014

The Walk Home


       Since the ruling had passed there was no more busing to her neighborhood in an attempt to cut costs.  It was a crock but she had no other choice but to walk to school.  Anyone who lived within 3 miles of the school had to now because the district simply couldn’t afford to run the buses for everyone.  She didn’t mind the walk really.  The exercise did her good.  Now that winter was fast approaching, the mornings were decidedly darker and by the time she reached home it was almost dark once again.  She did mind the dark.  It made her uneasy. 

        Now that she was forced to walk to and from school she wished she hadn’t joined the band and chosen to play the tuba.  Seriously, what had she been thinking?  The damn thing grew heavier with every step she took.  She was required to take it home to practice each day and cart it back day in and day out.  What with her backpack, her purse, and the damn tuba she was loaded down.  By the time she reached home she was exhausted from the trek.  Today was no different.  She approached the woods that provided her a shortcut home.  By all rights, she should stay on the sidewalk.    By that point in her journey she was tired and ready to be home, so with misgivings she took the shortcut anyway.


       Once surrounded by trees on all sides, the night closed in slowly around her.   She picked up speed, feeling a sense of foreboding the farther she walked.  The breeze rustled through the branches above.  A twig cracked behind her.  She turned quickly, but saw nothing.  Her heart beat double time as she walked a bit faster.  Another twig cracked.  The leaves rustled.  With her heart in her throat she looked back again.    In a split second her eyes focused on a shadow of a dark form lurking from behind the trees.  She saw a flash of metal…a knife.  The shadow smiled an evil white grin and started moving towards her.  With her heart in her throat, she ran.  He laughed and quickly pursued her, closing the gap between them.  He grabbed her arm and she screamed.  He pulled her towards him as she swung the tuba case at him.  The heavy case hit his chest, leaving him gasping.  She hurried away leaving the tuba behind.

       “You bitch! I’ll make you pay for that!” he promised as he chased her.  She tripped over a tree root and fell to the ground.  As she scrambled to gain her footing, he was upon her, slapping her hard across the face.  He grabbed her, laughing as he did.  “I have you now and you will be mine.”  He forced her to the ground, pulled duct tape from his pocket and bound her arms above her head.  She struggled and screamed for help.  He taped her mouth and produced a knife from his pocket.  Her eyes widened in horror as she watched him cut her and blood gush from the gash. “Ready to have a bit of fun?” he asked with a wicked grin.  Tears escaped her eyes as he raped her mutilating her body for his pleasure.


     “Oh dear God, help me escape!”  Her mind screamed.   The clouds shifted, casting an ominous shadow on the ground.  She realized then he was standing over her, finished and quite satisfied with himself.  “Thank you, too bad you didn’t seem to enjoy it as much as I did.” He mocked.  He walked away, as if he hadn’t a care in the world whistling a tune as he went.   Wearily, she closed her eyes, shutting him out, and welcomed the light that enveloped her.  She walked toward it with determination, away from the fear and pain that had consumed her only seconds before into the paradise that awaited her for eternity.
This is my response to the Speakeasy weekly prompt #161, which is to write a piece in 750 words or less (mine is 646).

 (1) using “The clouds shifted, casting an ominous shadow on the ground.” anywhere in the piece, 

 (2) making some kind of reference to the music prompt, which is Adele’s "Rolling in the Deep".  As an added challenge, we were challenged to write a story that was “family-free”, which means no mention of family relationships in the story.









42 comments:

  1. Heart wrenching Kathy! Every parents nightmare!!!

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    1. Joe, it certainly is. We have a similar ruling here where the kids have to walk to school in the town where I live. Fortunately that is not the case for the school system my kids go to. Still to cut costs the number of stops the bus makes have been greatly reduced to the point where my kids have to walk quite a ways to catch the bus. When it is nice I walk each of them to the bus stop and when it is not, I drive them. Call me paranoid, but I went through 9 months of hell to get those precious people here and intend to do everything in my power to keep them safe, alive, and well. During the winter months it is still really dark when they get on the bus so I take precautions. Thank you so much for stopping by to read and for your comments! ♥

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  2. Awful in every way, people like that need to be thrown in a deep dark hole.

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    1. Pat, I agree. There are some sick people in this world. Thank you so much for stopping by and for your sweet comments! I am pleased you enjoyed my story.

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  3. Excellent story Kathy. You capture the nightmare no-one wishes for their loved ones so nicely and effectively.

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    1. Michelle, I am so pleased I was able to capture the nightmare for you! That was what I was going for...to make the reader feel like they were right there experiencing it too. I am so happy you enjoyed my story. Thank you for stopping by and for your sweet comments! You have made my day! ♥

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  4. That was such a vivid narrative... could feel her heart racing and the doom thereafter! Wish it never happens to anybody, ever!

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    1. Shilpa, I am so pleased you enjoyed my story! Thank you so much for stopping by and for your sweet comments! ♥

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  5. You pulled the reader into the ominous woods with her. Well done.

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    1. Jo, I am so pleased you enjoyed it! Thank you for stopping by to read and for your lovely comments! ♥

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    1. Lyssa, I am so pleased you liked it!! Thank you so much for stopping by and for your sweet comments! ♥

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  7. Very sad and scary for sure.

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    1. JoJo, I am so pleased you liked it. Thank you for stopping by and for your sweet comments! Your continued support of my writing means an awful lot. ♥

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  8. I'm glad she found peace, but what a horrible fate.

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    1. Suzanne, I had to end it on a positive note considering the horror that led up to it. Thank you for stopping by to read and for your sweet comments! I am so pleased you enjoyed my little story. ♥

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  9. I could feel her terror and horror . . . bone-chilling, riveting prose, Kathy!

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    1. Martha, I am so happy you enjoyed it!! I am bouncing I am so pleased!! Thank you so much for stopping by and for your awesome comments. That was what I was going for...bone chilling, riveting, and terror. ♥

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  10. Oh the horror of the experience....you captured the girl's trauma and terror quite vividly. And the positive note at the end was very touching in a way. May her sense of peace and light within keep her safe.

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    1. Beloo, I had to end it that way. It would just be too tragic to end it any other way. Thank you so much for stopping by and for your sweet comments! ♥

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  11. ohh this is indeed a nightmare. Gripping narration

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    1. Rajlakshmi, I am so pleased you enjoyed it! Thank you for stopping by and for your sweet comments! ♥

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  12. Oh what a horrific experience. Glad this is fiction.

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    1. Suzy, it would be horrific and I am glad it is fiction too. Thank you for stopping by and for your sweet comments! I am so pleased you enjoyed my story! ♥

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  13. Gosh......I was just thinking of the 200 Nigerian Schoolgirls when I saw this!

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    1. Michele, that is ironic. Thank you for stopping by and for your kind comments! ♥

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  14. It made me think of all the helpless women out there who have been raped and live with the horror of that memory...and others who have died and left families behind to grieve. Women continue to be abused, and what is happening in other countries right now, Africa for instance, is so outrageous.

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    1. Sharon, it really is. If you survive it, rape is something you never forget. Thank you so much for stopping by and for your lovely comments! ♥

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  15. Oh my, that was horrifying read Kathy, your narration makes me feel scared to pick a shortcut... Brilliant write-up!!

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    1. Reshma, I am so pleased you enjoyed it! Thank you for stopping by and for your sweet comments! ♥

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  16. I think I liked this post the most of many of yours. Possibly because it struck a cord close to home. I was kidnapped, raped and left for dead. Much of the emotion you shared I remembered. You captured it well.

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    1. Carol, what a horrible experience for you! I think I captured it well because I was raped. Once you have been, you kind of know what it is like because you lived to tell the tale. Thank you for stopping by and for your kind comments! I am pleased you liked my post. ♥

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  17. That is horrifying- a complete nightmare! (On a lighter note, I had to chuckle at the tuba predicament... I think that explains why so many played the flute in band :) )

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    1. jannatwrites, no kidding!! HA HA. I am so pleased you liked my story. Thank you for stopping by and for your lighthearted comments! ♥

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  18. The whole time I was reading this was like I was watching a horror flick hoping she'd get away at any moment! You had me on the edge of my seat!

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    1. Renada, I am so pleased you enjoyed it! Thank you so much for stopping by to read and for making my day with you lovely compliments! ♥

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  19. Sad,terrifying and utterly devastating! I felt her fear,her panic,her terror and pain at every step.What a brilliantly written piece Kathy!

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    1. Atreyee, I am thrilled you enjoyed it so much and that I was able to recreate the scene so vividly for you! Thank you so much for stopping by and for your sweet comments! ♥

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  20. It has brought me into tears! The writing is brilliant when writer's feelings transfer into reader's! I hope this all ends forever- this enjoyment and exploitation by stronger over weaker...

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    1. Shesha, I am so pleased my writing moved you so and that you enjoyed my story! Thank you so much for stopping by and for your sweet comments! ♥

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  21. It scared me! Its the feeling I get when it gets dark and I am late for home!

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    1. nibhz, sorry I scared you...but at the same time I am pleased my writing was good enough to evoke fear as you read it. Thank you for paying me the highest compliment! ♥

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