Talking in Your Sleep- BFF 133

       My Dad used to snore so loud you could have compared it to laying next to a roaring chainsaw.  Still my mother who experienced it first hand often complained it sounded more like he was talking Chinese.   


       

      One night we had retired for the night.  The house was enveloped in silence and darkness.  It was one of those not a creature was stirring kind of nights.  Even the cats had found warm places to curl up and sleep.  One cat in particular would experience the fright of its life.    


      On this particular night a golden tabby cat who had a special fondness for my Dad had chosen to burrow under the covers snuggling in close to his legs before falling asleep.  Even the tremors of his snoring and Chinese reverberated down the hall,  I soon succumbed to dreamland.  All of a sudden I was awakened by the sounds of a yowling cat, claws scratching the tile, and the definite sound of upchucking.   I raced from my bed to discover what in the world was going on.

       To my surprise I found my mother laughing hysterically as the cat upchucked in the hall.  To make a long story short my Dad had farted on the cat in his sleep and blew that poor feline clear off the bed!  It raced from the room in terror making a terrible racket in it's wake.  The smell alone upset the cat so bad it proceeded to dry heave in the hallway.  My mom and I couldn’t stop laughing, and I nearly peed my pants from laughing so hard.

        After all the racket that my mom, the cat, and I made, my dad finally stumbled out to the hallway to see what was going on.  He found it hard to believe that one sonic boom of a fart could have created such a disturbance and thought we were both full of it.    Not only had the sheer loudness of it scared the be Je$u$ out of my mother, it had also caused the poor cat to flee in terror and upchuck in the hallway.  That night will live on in family folklore and my memories for eternity.   It was the night my dad dropped the bomb to the detriment of one unsuspecting pussy cat.   The cat survived the ordeal relatively unscathed and never again dared to sleep anywhere near my dad again.  Until next time when I give you another glimpse into the life of a truckers wife.