No Patience Here!

      When I go grocery shopping, or any kind of shopping for that matter, if there is a do it yourself register open I make a beeline to it and ring up my stuff myself.  I hate waiting in line and have absolutely no patience for it at all.  Inevitably I always choose the wrong lane to steer my cart into and get behind someone that can’t seem to handle it, the blinking light goes on begging for assistance, and there I wait rolling my eyes wondering why.

        At my local Meijer store they offer not only the 10 items or less do it yourself lanes but also the no limit lanes where you can ring up your own groceries.  I am a very conscious shopper and never hit the 10 items or less line unless I have 10 items or less.  It is just plain rude to go to an express lane with a cart load of groceries.  I got in line behind this lady in the no limit line, happy to have only one person ahead of me.  She had a lot of groceries to scan, but then I did too.  The store was busy, but I was next so I figured I would be out of there in no time.

         She began ringing up her groceries much like anyone else except she stopped before every single item to check if she had a coupon and then to READ the label.  At one point she stopped ringing up her groceries completely, gazed around as if lost, and grabbed one of the tabloids that were on a rack beside the register and proceeded to READ it.   I was getting seriously annoyed.  I mean, REALLY??? Who does this?  Then she started ringing up her stuff again without buying the magazine.  At one point she had some sort of mystery fruit or vegetable in a plastic bag that even she didn’t seem to know what it was.   She looked around.  She looked at me and then she pushed the button to summon for assistance.  I could feel myself literally growing older as I stood there.  Assistance came more than once, and then she would continue ringing up her order.  In total the woman needed professional assistance 5 times.

          When she finally had rang up everything in her cart it was time for her to sort through her mountain of coupons.  This proved to be too much for her.  She must have overheated, because at this point she took off her coat.  Crawling up her back was a stink bug the size of a dime…in January!!!!  I was appalled and my kids freaked.  She was oblivious.  Over a half hour later from the time we took our place behind her in line, she gathered her receipt that was long enough to have the novel “Gone with the Wind” printed on it and went on her merry way.

         I honestly thought I would never get out of that store!  I rang up my purchases and paid in less than two minutes and happily escaped!  Self-serve registers are a convenience that I habitually enjoy, but this time in the space of a half hour I traveled all the way from sane to shit house crazy.  I know patience is a virtue, and after this experience I realize that I possess very little of it.

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