Saturday, March 17, 2012

Reflection


      It is really easy to form an ideal image of yourself in your mind if you avoid your reflection at all costs.    In my mind, I still look young and vibrant, and I look good much as the kitten does as it gazes into the mirror.   Like the kitten I find the reality of my appearance disturbing which is the main reason I avoid mirrors at all costs.   I am no beauty queen by any stretch of the imagination.  Still, my reflection won't break anyone's camera either.     People don’t normally vomit when they look at me or run screaming in the other direction, so hells bells, I can’t look that bad.  I often smile at strangers when out and about, and they smile back because smiles are contagious.  Smiling makes everyone wonder what I have been up to, and that is exactly what I want them to think!







       As much as I hate my reflection, I forced myself to gaze deeply into the mirror and really look at what I saw.  What I realized as I stared myself down is that the parents I lost so long ago, were there staring back at me.  I can see my mother’s features dominating the reflection-same hazel eyes, and face shape.  I can see her stubbornness and courage. If I look really closely I can even see a little of my Dad.   I experienced an epiphany of sorts.  I realized they haven‘t completely left me.  They are still here because they live in me.  Their genetics are firmly woven together within me making me the person I am.   They live in  my appearance, personality, and  in almost every facet…I can see the best parts of them in me.  I see their zest for life.  When I look past what I consider my damning faults, I see a person full of pi$$ and vinegar with a twinkle in her eye having a tad bit more fun than she should be.  I see a woman that can handle anything life throws at her because I have little choice to do anything else.  The realization is comforting.  Not only do they live on vividly in my memories, but through me in my actions and laughter.  


       Like Simba of the Disney classic “The Lion King” I looked in my reflection and found those who I thought had abandoned me and were lost forever.  I found the best part of me.  I found the giggly, sparkly person out shining the fat lady with the bad hair.  I found me and realized I am not half bad.  I can’t help but grin and celebrate my discovery until next time when I give you another glimpse into the life of a trucker’s wife.



20 comments:

  1. This is lovely - what a beautiful reflection! Thank you for sharing this perspective - I'll have to remember it and try it myself.

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    1. Dawn, Awww thank you!! Thanks for stopping in to read and for your kind comments!

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  2. What a gift to be able to see your parents in your reflection. Reminding you that they are still a part of you. I often see my dad in my son, but it is harder to look at yourself objectively!

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    1. Wendy, that wasn't always the case. Usually when I looked in the mirror I just saw the too fat lady with the bad hair, but when I really looked and scrutinized myself for this post, I saw both of them. It made me look at the mirror in a whole different way. Thanks for stopping in!

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  3. And you should also celebrate the fact that your vision is still good. I haven't seen myself in years. Every time I try to look in the mirror, some fat, old lady jumps in front of me and blocks my view. She even had the nerve to get on my driver's license.

    Catch My Words
    http://joycelansky.blogspot.com

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    1. Joyce, you are a riot!! I can only see as good as my glasses allow me to. Without them I am blind as a bat! LOLOLOL Thank you for stopping in to read and for your comments!!!

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  4. Great reflection (no pun intended) and I have seen your "giggly, sparkly person" through many of your postings. I also have seen a very insightful and intelligent one as well. There have been days I've looked intot he mirror and seen my paretns (both passed in 2009) there as well. It's a very comforting thing indeed.

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    1. Amy, wow! I am literally beaming at you for all the praise!! I believe when I am down on myself I will come back to your comment for a pick me up. Thank you for stopping by and reading. I am so pleased you enjoyed my post!

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  5. Damn right Kathy, rock on girl, mirrors are over rated.

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    1. Fireman, you made me giggle!! Damn right!! LOL Thanks for stopping by!

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  6. You are beautiful.. Repeat, repeat, repeat.. I love that you see your parents in your reflection.. I always see my father's eyes and it makes me think of that old Amy Grant song, "My Father's Eyes." Always makes me feel so much better..
    Great post. :)

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    1. Mimi, Awww thank you!! I am literally glowing inside! I love that song too. I am so pleased you enjoyed my post. Thank you so much for stopping by!

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  7. What an insightful post. Thank you for sharing your thoughts! You have a good message. I need to spend more time appreciating what is behind my reflection : )

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    1. Emily, thank you for stopping by to read and for your kind comments!! I bet you will be surprised what you find if you really study your reflection!!

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  8. Well, Kathy -- I'm getting old and wrinkly but the image of my Mother. So, as always, this was a most interesting post to read.

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    1. Betty, what I find interesting to contemplate is I wonder if I were able to go back and look at old photographs of my ancestors if I would find similarities in their appearances to my own. Wouldn't that be fascinating?? I know for facts that my great grandfather published a book and my great aunt was a very talented artist. I have always been very artistic and now I write. Interesting, isn't it?? I am so pleased you enjoyed my post and stopped by!! Thank you for your comments!!

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    1. Jenn, oh thank you!! I am so pleased you enjoyed it!! Thank you for stopping by to read and for your kind comments!!

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  10. I always see my mom looking through me in the mirror. I don't have any of my dad's features but my sister does and my brother is a combination of our parents. I see that in them and I love it. I am Momma's mini~me. Except I am a good 5 inches taller than little Momma is. lol
    What a lovely thought when you are looking in the mirror. Thanks for sharing that. It's all good.

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    1. Jo, it is so comforting for me. I thought my mom was really pretty but never felt I was. It makes me happy to see glimpses of her in the mirror. I see a glimpse of my Dad. My sister looks more like my dad than I do. Thank you for stopping by to read and comment!!

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