Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Loyalty

     Loyalty is a precious commodity. In my opinion it isn’t given lightly, it is earned. There is no other loyalty quite like what exists in marriage. Sadly few people find that kind either. The sanctity of marriage and it’s longevity seems to be a thing of the past. I happen to be cut from the cloth of the old school beliefs where you meet someone, fall in love, get married, have kids, and then die. To many people can’t find someone who is loyal and prefer to live together and have kids with no commitments from either side.

     I witnessed a devotion and loyalty in my father that I have rarely seen elsewhere. He loved my mom with every fiber of his being. I only ever remember seeing my dad cry twice. The first time was the heart wrenching sobs that shook his whole body during her funeral, and the second time was when he sat broken in his wheel chair after a stroke had robbed him of his mobility and begged me that if a time ever came that I had to make the decision to sustain his life to let him go. As tears rolled down his face he explained that he had waited 11 long years to be with my mom. He was tired of waiting. He couldn’t stand facing life in a wheelchair. He couldn’t face life without her anymore. He wanted to be with her. If that meant going on to heaven or being laid to rest beside her in the cemetery, it made little difference. There was never anyone else for him but her.

 

     I am a lot like my dad. When I took the vows, it was forever. That is how I feel about my husband. He is the only one for me. I can never imagine there ever being anyone else but him. When he is gone, I will be alone end of story. I trust him completely, and I am certain he feels the same way about me. When you are in a marriage where one of you is a truck driver and gone more than not, loyalty and trust are important to have. It keeps the marriage strong, and any other difficulties and misunderstandings can be overcome because in the end love does conquer all.

     Still being in a marriage with a truck driver does take its toil simply because there is so much time spent apart. Fortunately, I have never had a reason to worry because my husband is as loyal to me as I am to him. My husband has colleagues that have constant marital problems simply because the wife who is at home can not live without a man. She changes men as often as normal women change underwear, and still her husband returns to her side. I couldn’t survive in a relationship like that. It would be a deal breaker for me. Fortunately my husband and I are on the same page on that note.

     In the end, loyalty boils down to one thing: the ability to stick it out and have someone’s back through thick and thin and sick and sin.   Until next time, when I give you another glimpse into the life of a truckers wife.

18 comments:

  1. A lovely post Kathy--so heartfelt!! I know you to be that type of loyal person--you are a very fortunate woman!

    Cheers, Jenn.

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  2. Jenn, thank you for stopping in to read and comment!! I feel very blessed for my husband. He can be a real gem, and my dad sent an awesome example of loyalty, love, and dedication.

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  3. Our parents do, in fact, lay the ground work for how we value the people in our lives. I fear that is one area I let my own children down. I walked out of a marriage and took them with me. Their father in turn, walked out on them. They were less than 10 miles apart and yet they hardly knew each other. It's a shame and the loyalty lesson wasn't nearly as strong as the example I had.
    Beautiful post by a beautiful person. :)

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  4. Jo, thanks for stopping in to read and comment. You did what you had to do in a bad situation. You got your kids into a better environment for all concerned. Don't be so hard on yourself. You have probably taught your kids loyalty in other areas of your life like how you handle other relationships at work, within your family, and with friends. I am sure they will be fine. Thank you for your kindness.

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  5. Just lovely, Kathy--both your parents' marriage and yours. My husband and I are that way too, and I realize and appreciate just what a rare and wonderful blessing this kind of relationship is. I LOVED this post.

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  6. Word Nerd, thank you for stopping in to read and comment. I am so pleased you enjoyed my post!!! My parents had their ups and downs and even went so far as to get a divorce. The divorce didn't matter much, because the day it was final they knew they had made a dreadful mistake. I never knew this bit of history until I was a teenager and it came as a shock because my dad had always been there for me and the family. I was the surprise that brought them back together it seems. LOL Love that lasts is rare and I feel very blessed to have gotten it so right with my husband. I screwed up the first time around, but sure made up for it with my husband now.

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  7. Another beautiful post, Kathy. Loyalty is such an important part of any relationship, especially with family. So, you really put it well!

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  8. This is lovely. I'm also a rare death-til-you-part gal! I also pray that my children will learn that from me when they get old enough. There's too many in the world today that just don't possess that conviction.

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  9. Your folks remind me of mine. When my dad died, my mom was ready to go. They had been married more than 60 years. That kind of loyalty is a rare and beautiful thing.

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  10. Your wedding pic is sooo sweet!

    I am blessed with one of those loyal husbands and I'm of the same mind as you... If he dies, I will also be alone and not in the market for a new husband. Nope...he is one of a kind and no one can replace him...end of story.

    I love your loyalty blog!

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  11. Betty, thank you for stopping by to read and comment!! I am so pleased you enjoyed my loyalty post. I have taught my children to be the best of friends, because when it all comes down to it, they will have each other.

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  12. Angie, thank you for stopping by to read and comment!! I agree completely with you!! If my children learn nothing else from me, I hope they learn how important the sanctity of marriage is and how important it is to have each other and family.

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  13. Angela, I agree completely! Thank you for stopping by to read and comment!

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  14. Darlene, I am so pleased you enjoyed my loyalty blog!! I wrote it with tears literally streaming down my face. After all, when you enter into marriage it is for life, joined as one and all that. I believe that completely. I am just thankful that out of the sea of billions of men I found my perfect match!

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  15. Kathy, I'm very happy for you and the loyalty you and your husband feel toward each other. The story of your Dad touched me. It sounds like you had wonderful parents! Thanks for sharing.

    p.s. Nice wedding picture! ;)

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  16. Beachlover, thank you for stopping by to read and comment. I am so pleased you enjoyed my post. I did have great parents. There isn't a day that passes that I don't think about them and miss them. As far as the wedding picture goes, it was one of my favorites. You may never see me looking that good again! LOL That is just about as good as it gets.

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  17. This is a beautiful post, it makes me happy. Super pictures, too.

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  18. Langley, thank you for your kind comments. I am so pleased you enjoyed it!!

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